Canine Charmer Pillows

"I just got released from da pound. What's yer name, sweetie?"

"Oooooh....a western wear dog cone. Sexy!"

"Don't think of them as fleas. Think of them as your entourage!"

'The Stepford Dogs'

'Oh great, he's wagging his tail... I can't do this.'

Sit! Stay!

Pet Shop: "I think I've found one for me."

"My master got my new tags. Now I've got collar ID!"

Spot's favorite game is "hard to pet".

"Remember... the cork. You're supposed to smell the cork!"

"I'm working on finding a healthier alternative to sniffing butts."

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

'Whup - giant anaconda about to attack - quick Peg, hand me something to take care of it with.'

'By golly, I think we've got ourselves a prodigy!'

"He is throwing another of his 'hissy fits' again!"

"Might I suggest something wicked for dessert?"

'Look what I've got, Dad - Can I keep it?'

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

'Oh don't worry, we had him defanged.'

You're the olive in my martini

Only then, did Medusa realise her mistake.

My wife's been talking to the skin I shed for over an hour.

'Honestly! You really ought to see someone about that cough of yours.'

"You shouldn't have hypnotised him"

"Here's the deal, throw me back and I won't text your boss telling him you called in sick to fish."

Snake reads the book The Taming Of The Shrew.

Snake Eyes

I'd invite you in, but my husband, my boyfriend and my python are all very jealous.

'Stop whispering in my ear, it tickles!'

'What did St. Patrick have against snakes?'

While at the Zoo, Victoria gets an idea.

'May I have the key to your heart?'

'...and then the bad woman gave the snake the apple, and that's when our problems began.'

'Well of course there are no snakes, have you not heard of St Patrick, at all, at all?'