Campus Socialite Gifts

'Dr. Young is a professor at one of the nation's leading party schools.'

Freshers Week

"My email is down... talk to me."

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

Cellphone Islands

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

"Another flue shot, Larry.

Children's Party

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"If we're a team, the manager should take the heat!"

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Whoa! Wrong bar?"

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

Rod was unimpressed with the party - Sure, he was surrounded by bikini-clad lovelies, there was free champagne and a 20-foot jelly, but much to his chagrin, there was a distinct lack of cheese and pineapple chunks.

'Look at him with another business model on his arm.'

"I never get a girls name tattooed on a first date."

'Everyone here likes a big band, right?'

A day at the races

'Ah, beer! And the bringer of beer!'

"Your cubicle is fun, too. Now if you'll excuse me, I was invited to Jim's cubicle."

"Brian's considering the optics."

'Fill 'er up Fred!'

'Can I get you anything? Coffee? A biscuit?...A lift home?'

"Nothing beats work events to mingle, build relationships, and backstab fellow colleagues."

'Oh, we've met. We were once married to one another.'

"This is the Upper East Side, sir. We don’t sell ‘well’ vodka."

"Francophobe meet Francophile."

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'