Business Insider Giggler Gifts

Keep the Status Quoing.

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

I have decided that all future board meetings will be held before lunch.

'I can't hire you, but I can sell you some stock in the company.'

'It's not just a job. It's about being part of something bigger than yourself.'

That should get you motivated.

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

"What's Tim doing on the window ledge?"

'How are you at takeovers?'

'It's a deal, for $15 an hour, I'll stand in front of your office.'

"Guess who's going to be on national television apologizing to the American public."

"Will you two stop giggling every time I say 'assets'?"

'Here's a composite of our target consumer.'

'It's a sprained ankle again. Why are you always slipping on banana peels?'

"I have your evaluation...great teamwork, great morale...basically, you're a good dog."

Man about executive: 'Success went to his head. There was plenty of room there.'

T-rex takes a selfie

"The GOOD news is that customers complaints are down, the BAD news is that we've got no customers."

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

"It's bad news I'm afraid...we've lost his web site!"

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

"When I said you were instrumental to this company, the instrument I had in mind was a kazoo."

'Sorry, I've some bad news about your nest egg.'

"Must you do that every time I say interest rates are bound to rise?"

"Let's just issue last year's annual report and see if anyone notices."

'Yes, I did receive your resume. As a matter of fact, I'm passing it around the office as we speak.'

You didn't tell me it was iTheatre...

"When I suggested to corporate that we make our meetings more fun, I was hoping for more than just holding them in a sandbox."

The spirit of creative challenge is the driving force of our corporate philosophy.

'He'll never find us. We hacked his GPS.'

'...Hi. Just called to say I ate a bag of chips.'

Yoga studio: In 234 and Out 234.

"These are of all my affiliates."

"I'm woried that our company motto makes us look shifty."