Breeders Gifts

'Here comes the pimp.'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"The Lord works in mysterious ways, I mean, alpacas? What are they? It’s like Bob Seger mated with a llama."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

'Well, they're just great for running down gazelles and jackals!'

"His mother was a poodle and his father was a shoe."

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

Puppies

"His father came from a family of climbers."

Fred and Nancy believed that their mutual love of a good sale would be enough to overcome 'the species issue'... but they were wrong.

"You are going to have lots of puppies."

Man lets his pigeons out to be fed in the park.

Shepherd, Herder, Hunter, Thinker.

'Boy, am I going to be pleased when the pregnancy is over...'

Good, but not Great Danes.

'Get me everything you have on bunny rabbits.'

"Congratulations. It's a litter."

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

'I understand you don't have a resume but you do have your pedigree papers?'

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

"The guy I bought him from says he's a pure sheepdog."

'I remember, Fido, winning isn't the only thing...there are also stud fees.'

Standard Poodle/Substandard Poodle

An inbred poodle.

'Perhaps you'd like to explain this,'