Breakfast Banter Pillows

Receiving the early morning t-mail.

"Your egg is bad? Don't blame me, I only laid the table!"

Every morning the office gossip was cascaded down...

Mums coffee morning

Young girl asks young boy what time he wakes in the morning

'I'm looking for people who find me intimidating.'

'I want a big breakfast.. there are a lot of contended female cats in the neighborhood this morning.'

"I'll have the chicken or the eggs benedict—whichever of them comes first."

'This corn's got dandruff.'

Menu From The Luxury Home of Pancakes

Chris Evans

The market must be up

Instant human... just add coffee

'One slice of toast and a bottle of ketchup, please.'

'That's strange -- there seems to be a pop-tart in your disk drive.'

"What's the Chef's Surprise Sir? Well, he's VERY surprised his kitchen has just survived a visit from the Government Food and Hygiene Inspector!"

'The cereal killer has struck again, Sarge.'

"I was going to wake you up with oral sex this morning, but you looked like you could use the extra sleep."

'I'm gonna tell Mom you ate a bad word!'

'Is it too early to start driving you out of your mind?'

Smoke gets in your eyes.

'I guess if I looked half as good in the morning as her, you'd spend breakfast with me?'

How Life Changes In A Paperless Society.

'If you have a referee in Football, what do you have in bowls?'

"That play last night..." "It was good." "Good." "Pinter wrote it." "Good, wasn't it?" "I thought it was good." "It was." "Yes. Harold Pinter."

'I prefer flakes.' 'Figures.'