Bonus Skeptic Gifts

'Such a small bonus.'

Find the failed CEO who got a 200 million dollar bonus while being fired.

Ex-Banker: Can you spare the price of a cup of tea? Anything else is a bonus.

'Your sense of entitlement is beginning to show.'

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

'Your salary will help you learn the lesson that life is not fair.'

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

'A 10M bonus for your thoughts.'

"It's a great story, funny and entertaining - and better still it's not won a single prize for literature."

'But the good news is, I still get a big bonus.'

'Wagner, if I paid you what you're worth, you'd be working for nothing!'

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'We hoped you'd respond more enthusiastically to our incentive program.'

'Every man has his price, Peterson. I've decided yours is £2.75.'

'Not for what I'm getting paid!'

'Well, okay. So we almost bankrupted the country. But we've managed to make a slight profit thanks to the government bail out package, so who can possibly deny us a fat bonus this year?'

'After talking to him. it's clear our only hope for a bonus this year is Santa Claus.'

We don't think your 12 million dollar bonus is obscene. We think it's 12 million little ways to say 'I love you.'

Charity Shop Income on Rise

'Call me a cockeyed optimist but I still believe big executive bonuses and perks can buy happiness.'

'Yes we do have health benefits, but read the fine print. You're only allowed to get sick once every three years.'

'I think the global banking sector, drunk on years of excessive bonuses, may need a little more than your 'very angry' T-shirt to make them toe the line.'

"Too much caution can take all the fun out of life." "Mind if I get a second opinion?"

'I'll have a big bonus please.'

'It's simple, really. This line stays high and sets a good example for the other line.'

"It was a mixed dayon wall street. Stocks were down, but bonuses were up."

'You're addicted to big bonuses. But the good news is there's a patch to treat that.'

Bankers Christmas Bonus Dome.

"It's all very well for people to go on about restraining hedge fund managers...but they have not idea of what we do!"

The company didn't pay a bonus this year

'We're with you half way, sir. We'll return our government bailout if we can keep our executive bonuses.'

'I guess it's better than no bonus at all.'

You wanted to see me again, boss? Yes. I realized you never gave me my Christmas bonus. What're you talking about? You're the boss. You give me a bonus, I don't give you a bonus. Exactly. The key word in employer-employee relationship is relationship. One-sided relationships never work, Rudy. I've calculated the amount you would have paid me if you hadn't been taking me for granted for 16 years. Very bad man.

'Getting a big bonus to risk other people's money makes me wonder if I am part of a conspiracy.'

"We have no golden parachutes."