Blue-collar Champions Gifts

'I'm union. I'm serving time and a half.'

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Time Out For Teddy

White Collar Crime.

"White Collar Prison"

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

Ponzi-Mat Vending Machine

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"

“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”

A deadline comes to chew up a worker.

Hellbillies.

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

'Quite frankly sir, I think you're stifling my creativity.'

'I don't want to rob the rich anymore, Marian, I want to BE the rich.'

'As your friend, I'd advise you to leave the country. As your accountant, I advise you to file for bankruptcy.'

'I've proved to the company I can make the tough rationalizations.'

"Now we'll all close our eyes and cover our ears, and the person who took the four hundred and twenty-eight million dollars will put it back."

"As your cell bitch, I imagine my Sarbanes-Oxley expertise should come in quite handy."

'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'

Joe's Bar: Gentlemen must wear blue collars.

Fraud Squad

'The company has got flexible working hours. I've got to be on the spot when they need me, that's why they tie me to a tree near the front door after work.'

"I'm getting notes of 2 x 4."

As you can see we've had to downsize our workforce.

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

'You're too late...I embezzled it.'

'Honey! I got promoted to long sleeves!'

"I've never met one, but I hear offices have fire drills."

Job Safety - Safety Goal.

"As a manager I might have my head in the clouds, but it's much better than being a worker who has his whole body in the dirt!"

Running after money.

'See what they've done to the minimum wage?' - 'As long as they don't change the maximum wage.'