Blue-collar Champion Gifts

'...your job's been transferred to India.'

"If nothing else needs welding, Paula, I'm going to lunch."

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Time Out For Teddy

Ponzi-Mat Vending Machine

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

White Collar Crime.

"Okay guys you have your assignments. Let's get cracking!"

A deadline comes to chew up a worker.

The blue-collar diner for white-collar people...

Hellbillies.

"At first I thought it was just coincidence, then I noticed it corresponded perfectly to your shift."

'This resume is incredible. Would you be able to lie this well under pressure?'

'I've proved to the company I can make the tough rationalizations.'

'I don't want to rob the rich anymore, Marian, I want to BE the rich.'

'As your friend, I'd advise you to leave the country. As your accountant, I advise you to file for bankruptcy.'

'Dad, somehow I got into the IRS files.'

"As your cell bitch, I imagine my Sarbanes-Oxley expertise should come in quite handy."

As you can see we've had to downsize our workforce.

'The company has got flexible working hours. I've got to be on the spot when they need me, that's why they tie me to a tree near the front door after work.'

Fraud Squad

Joe's Bar: Gentlemen must wear blue collars.

'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'

"I'm getting notes of 2 x 4."

'No, no, I've gone through all the steps in the procedure and I don't see anything about totally immersing yourself in oil before starting the job!!

'You're too late...I embezzled it.'

'Honey! I got promoted to long sleeves!'

"I've never met one, but I hear offices have fire drills."

Job Safety - Safety Goal.

'I need a new hobby in here. I used to be into creative accounting.'

'His job is to follow the paperless trail.'

Running after money.

"As a manager I might have my head in the clouds, but it's much better than being a worker who has his whole body in the dirt!"