Biblical Narrative Enthusiast Gifts

"Instead, let me be your investment advisor and get you eleven-per-cent return, year in and year out, regardless of market conditions."

"I hope he understands the damage he is doing to the image of landlords."

"I'm not a fan of biblical movies."

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

"I've told you before one at each end!"

"Hang on, isn't this the second pair of zebras we've had today?"

Church Library - Pop-Up Books

"Maybe you should go make sure we're in the right line."

'You say the ARKS are NOT two by two?'

". . . I called this meeting to communicate that I had dinner Noah..."

"And maybe throw in a talking snake to make sure they don't take it literally."

"If this Goliath bloke is as big as they say, I can just hang around the forest until he's gone."

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

Noah's ark, many lions

Christian and Born again Christian...

'Why did Moses wander in the desert for forty years?'

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Paul was Generally Considered the Cutest Apostle

Regifts of the Magi

"Remember, God created you. Evolution will get you left behind."

"I can never remember if it's smite or smote."

'Please Miss, is it where Noah kept his bees?'

'Noah, before you leave we'd like to have a word with you!'

''Tree of Knowledge,' eh? - Has it been fact-checked?'

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

Adam and Eve in Paradise

Moses' TV guide.

'Yes, they've been fact-checked!'