Biblical History Gifts

"If push comes to shove, I bet you could do some damage with the plowshare."

Moses with the Ten Commandments on a Ski Lift

Wilderness GPS

"Not sure that's the graven image of Baal we were looking for."

Moses holds the two tablets on which the Ten Commandments are written; one of them is shaped like a foam finger used for sporting events

Goliath's Toe Truck

"It's a binary star - that means we'll find twins."

Manna from heaven puts the olfactory talents of Israel's dogs to the test.'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

'Thanks! -- These will look great on the coffee table!'

'Pleased to meet you, George, my name's Arthur.'

'They always call it 'Noah's flood,' like it was my fault or something!'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

You Have 1 New Messages

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

Moses on the web

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Too 'Book of Genesis'?"

"Wait 'til my Dad hears about this!"

The Apostle Paul receives a reply from the Corinthians.

'Wow! -- Talk about a paradigm shift!'

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

'Yes, all at once!'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

"We didn't want to know the gender in advance."

TSA Noah

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

Well HERE'S some good news...Judgement Day has been replaced by a multiple choice questionnaire.

"I've got writer's block."