Bible History Buff Gifts

'We had an Old Testament skit today. Al Sims was the Hittite, and I was the hittee.'

"Obviously, somebody screwed up somewhere."

Moses Parting the Red Tea

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

Trump Administration Raising White Flag in Ukraine

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

Gender Equality

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Who will determine Venezuela's future?

Great Chinese Dynasties

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

Valuable business advice from some famous disruptive technologies.

International Women's Day

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

Flags

Though he created more than 300 products from peanuts, George Washington Carver was unable to change even one of them back into a peanut.

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"What's a patent?"

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Easter Island legs