Beauty Pageant Organizer Gifts

Meet Miss Subways

Miss Armpits

Headline: Miss World moved to London - 'Why so much fuss about a woman getting stoned?'

Miss America IQ Pageant

'I'm looking for a good summer looks....I can't read yet.'

The return of Miss Subways

'Is that enough peace on earth, Miss? I've got my tuba lesson in ten minutes and kickboxing at six...'

"Well, if I didn't send away for an entry application to the cat show, and you didn't send away for an entry application, who did?"

Hospital gown pageant.

Animal Olympics: 'What do you say next year we have some non-cheetah races?'

Beer Cannon

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

Linda Carter played Wonder Woman on the odl TV show. Her dad was Irish-American and her mom was Mexican-American. Before that, she was Miss World USA. Before that, she was forced by her abuelita to eat beauty and muscle foods like rice and beans."

Circus Pageant

Future beauty pageant contestants' Christmas wish.

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

"She really lights up a room. Face it Patty, we don't hold a candle to her."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

'I'm your new editor and not only is this cartoon the funniest one ever made, but it also discovered the cure for cancer and exposes a new,safe and free energy source and it's brought an end to religious wars and that turns me on and I use...'

Model's aspirations

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

Westminster's fine, but this show is just sick. Puppies & Tiaras.

Miss America IQ pageant.

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

"Poor lady, she never wins these pageants. She has a really weird run."

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

'Weren't they the ones who had wished for world peace?'

Dear Diary, today I'm feeling beautiful...

Beauty contest

“It’s the same everywhere: body over brains.”

"Bigger cake."

Favorite author? Whoever wrote the Bible.

"Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!"

In this pageant contestants must knowingly provide incorrect responses to questions. Ah, "Miss Information"!

Doris always made a big impact in the swimwear section of the beauty contest