Pageant Enthusiast Gifts

"Now here's a gageant contestan I can cheer for." "Why, what's her talent?" "Paintball."

'I flunked all my subjects, but I won 'Miss Congeniality.''

'I flunked all my subjects, but I won 'Miss Congeniality.''

Dreams of being a beauty queen

Miss America IQ Pageant

'How come the Miss Universe Pageant is awlays held on Earth?'

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

Miss Jumbo Queen Pageant.

'I could wile away the hours / Conferrin' with the flowers / Consultin' with the rain...'

'Welcome to the Miss Universe Pageant! And for the 62nd year in a row, Miss Bermuda is mysterious missing!'

'In the talent category, Miss District of Columbia will shred paper.'

Miss America IQ pageant.

"As the new Miss Individual I shouldn't care what you think."

Miss Train Wreck of Tomorrow

Beauty Contest

'I know she's only four, but it helps her deal with the stress.'

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

Priest and Beauty Queen

"My wife enters every competition going."

'Shakespeare is my favorite author I've never read!'

"Do you suppose she's Miss Egypt?"

Beauty Pageant. Miss Anthrope will never be Miss Congeniality --- She hates everybody!

The Other Grammy Awards

"I think I'm in the wrong place, and yet I do not care."

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

'I'm looking for a good summer looks....I can't read yet.'

Hospital gown pageant.

'And do you, grand marshal Froomkin, promise to always love a parade?'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Circus Pageant

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

"She really lights up a room. Face it Patty, we don't hold a candle to her."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

Model's aspirations