Pageant Aficionado Gifts

Miss America IQ Pageant

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Circus Pageant

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

'I'm your new editor and not only is this cartoon the funniest one ever made, but it also discovered the cure for cancer and exposes a new,safe and free energy source and it's brought an end to religious wars and that turns me on and I use...'

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

'In our class's Christmas pageant, I'm playing the department store manager.'

"Poor lady, she never wins these pageants. She has a really weird run."

Dear Diary, today I'm feeling beautiful...

Miss America IQ pageant.

'Weren't they the ones who had wished for world peace?'

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

Beauty contest

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

“It’s the same everywhere: body over brains.”

Favorite author? Whoever wrote the Bible.

"Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!"

7th annual weird fishes pageant

Miss Jumbo Queen Pageant.

'We've decided to skip the swimsuit competition on account of how disgusting we all look.'

'I could wile away the hours / Conferrin' with the flowers / Consultin' with the rain...'

'Welcome to the Miss Universe Pageant! And for the 62nd year in a row, Miss Bermuda is mysterious missing!'

Doris always made a big impact in the swimwear section of the beauty contest

Beauty Contest

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Miss Universe Contest.