Beauty Pageant Aficionado Gifts

The vain but realistic queen

Miss America IQ Pageant

Hospital gown pageant.

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

Future beauty pageant contestants' Christmas wish.

Linda Carter played Wonder Woman on the odl TV show. Her dad was Irish-American and her mom was Mexican-American. Before that, she was Miss World USA. Before that, she was forced by her abuelita to eat beauty and muscle foods like rice and beans."

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Circus Pageant

"She really lights up a room. Face it Patty, we don't hold a candle to her."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

'I'm your new editor and not only is this cartoon the funniest one ever made, but it also discovered the cure for cancer and exposes a new,safe and free energy source and it's brought an end to religious wars and that turns me on and I use...'

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

Model's aspirations

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

Westminster's fine, but this show is just sick. Puppies & Tiaras.

'Weren't they the ones who had wished for world peace?'

Miss America IQ pageant.

“It’s the same everywhere: body over brains.”

Beauty contest

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

Dear Diary, today I'm feeling beautiful...

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

Favorite author? Whoever wrote the Bible.

Miss Jumbo Queen Pageant.

'I could wile away the hours / Conferrin' with the flowers / Consultin' with the rain...'

7th annual weird fishes pageant

Beauty Contest

'Welcome to the Miss Universe Pageant! And for the 62nd year in a row, Miss Bermuda is mysterious missing!'

'As the new Miss Individual I shouldn't care what you think.'

"Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!"

Meet Miss Subways

In this pageant contestants must knowingly provide incorrect responses to questions. Ah, "Miss Information"!

Doris always made a big impact in the swimwear section of the beauty contest

'We've decided to skip the swimsuit competition on account of how disgusting we all look.'

Blank Inside