Pageant Participant Gifts

Circus Pageant

Miss America IQ Pageant

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

'I'm looking for a good summer looks....I can't read yet.'

Hospital gown pageant.

'And do you, grand marshal Froomkin, promise to always love a parade?'

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

"She really lights up a room. Face it Patty, we don't hold a candle to her."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

Model's aspirations

Westminster's fine, but this show is just sick. Puppies & Tiaras.

'In our class's Christmas pageant, I'm playing the department store manager.'

Miss America IQ pageant.

"Poor lady, she never wins these pageants. She has a really weird run."

Dear Diary, today I'm feeling beautiful...

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

'Weren't they the ones who had wished for world peace?'

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

Beauty contest

Favorite author? Whoever wrote the Bible.

"Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!"

Beauty Contest

Doris always made a big impact in the swimwear section of the beauty contest

Miss Jumbo Queen Pageant.

'Welcome to the Miss Universe Pageant! And for the 62nd year in a row, Miss Bermuda is mysterious missing!'

'I could wile away the hours / Conferrin' with the flowers / Consultin' with the rain...'

Uncle Tom

In this pageant contestants must knowingly provide incorrect responses to questions. Ah, "Miss Information"!

7th annual weird fishes pageant

Blank Inside

"I'm Miss Missouri, but my goal is to become Miss California."

"I think I'm in the wrong place, and yet I do not care."