Beard Collector Pillows

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Renk just discovered beard oil."

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

"Don't shave it. It gives your face character."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

A daily rubdown with a beard brush will wrangle awkward bristles and train them downwards...

Emergency Hipster Beard

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

wattle covers

"It's called, 'Goth'."

General Meade's Army, Near Culpepper - Shaving in Camp

The Beard in the Stone

"Face it, Clive - you're bald."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'Long shift?'

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

"Actually, I think you looked better WITH a beard."

Bearded Leftie.

Peak Beard/High Peak Beard

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

The Organic

"I noticed a few browns."

"Would the gentleman care for a razor and comb to start?"

'To grow a good beard, have good dental habits. First, brush with a concave brush to clean the teeth's facial surfaces. Then use a convex brush to reach flat surfaces. Then use a scalloped brush to be chic. Then floss to clean between teeth. Then use ...

Official Team Cap With Beard

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'