Bear Market Hibernator Gifts

'The current business climate is keeping the bears in hibernation.'

Sub-prime Bear

What happens when the bears are running the market.

'Time to buy.'

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

'What's this I hear about you going long?'

Stock market books.

'Don't blame me, turkey - I've never been near Wall Street.'

"I'm sorry, sir, but Professor Dornley does not wish to be distracted for the duration of the winter."

'Don't give me all that bull about a strong market - I said sell!'

"Business has picked up since we introduced short term cryogenic stays for the football off season."

'He used to swear by the stock market. Now he swears at it.'

'My advice is: Hold on to your stock so you can look back at this and laugh.'

"I don't care if we did hibernate all Winter, I'm still tired."

Papa bear plays the stockmarket.

The Off-Season

Stock market recession strategy.

"Jeez, Honey, will you hurry up in there? I've been hibernating all winter, too, y'know!"

"We have had some bumps and bruises on the stock market."

Markets Drama

"The market was doing so well I decided not to hibernate this year."

New York Stock Exchange: Feed the bears at your own risk.

"This is Thurgood. He specializes in beaten-down stocks."

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

'Of course I'll charge you 8,- for an empty glass of scotch. Never heard of bear sales, sir?'

"I'm sorry but here we have a strict policy about hiring anyone who's squirmish about investing"

'Probably just another correctional movement...'

Make Your Portfolio BEARable.

How to bare up in a bare market.

'At last a sign the bear market may be over.'

Bull and bear in boxing ring.

'Eat. Sleep all winter. These are your resolutions?'

Groundhog Day

"You're new around here."

Death of a broker.