Bear Market Tactician Gifts

"This is Thurgood. He specializes in beaten-down stocks."

The president's men

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

Sub-prime Bear

What happens when the bears are running the market.

'Time to buy.'

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

'What's this I hear about you going long?'

"That was a rumor day."

Stock market books.

'Don't blame me, turkey - I've never been near Wall Street.'

'Don't give me all that bull about a strong market - I said sell!'

'My advice is: Hold on to your stock so you can look back at this and laugh.'

'He used to swear by the stock market. Now he swears at it.'

Papa bear plays the stockmarket.

Stock market recession strategy.

'Sir! We're all doomed! It's a fitted sheet! How can we ever hope to stop something we can't even fold?!'

Markets Drama

'Remember, shares can also go down...'

New York Stock Exchange: Feed the bears at your own risk.

Thanks to his stocks, Bob now lives in the middle of a great green garden outside the crowded city.

How to bare up in a bare market.

'Probably just another correctional movement...'

'At last a sign the bear market may be over.'

"Buy on the dip, ignore the blip, and sell before the bubble bursts."

"I'm sorry but here we have a strict policy about hiring anyone who's squirmish about investing"

'I don't know about you, Sam, but so far my clients aren't going for this cross between tradtional and online trading.'

'Of course I'll charge you 8,- for an empty glass of scotch. Never heard of bear sales, sir?'

Make Your Portfolio BEARable.

The invisible hand of the marketplace.

'The current business climate is keeping the bears in hibernation.'

Death of a broker.

"You're new around here."

"The free investment advice is buy low and sell high. We offer more detailed advice for a fee."

Man cheering at stock market collapse - "He owns an anti-stress patent!"