Bdsm Aficionados Gifts

"He forgot our 'safe word'."

Vendor selling testosterone.

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

'The penguin is upset...'

'The man was real nice about it. He gave me my ball back and even said you can expect a nice call from his lawyer.'

Welcome Bureaucrats! (Convention of bureaucrats).

Ahhh, spring baseball.

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

'Apparently the poor love's walkman is broken.'

'It's an old badminton injury.'

'Anything else need tying up?'

Boom Box

'Remember his weakness is a pulled tendon, so keep it as high as your bursitis will let you, but take it easy with your fast ball because of my bone chips.'

New driving hazards perception test....'I've crashed the computer.'

The Shuttle-Cock Nuisance.

Who should have been nominated to baseball's hall of fame 2013...

"Whoa! Now Philly has the bases loaded with one out!..."

"Then, unfortunately, our market launch ran into a brick wall."

'Sure, it's an improvement. But I guess we'll need to get to the airport a lot earlier from now on...'

"Are you sure you've done this before?"

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, you have GOT to be kidding!!! Who on earth would seriously write to Sadie? What kind of masochistic, submissive freak would submit themselves to the derision and abuse of, uh … Sadie … uh, er … a malevolent … and, uh … controlling … Oh, my Dominatrix! Deal with me as you know you must! - Chevre. Ha. Ha ha. Very cute. Seems like a joke, right? What? I recognize the mood, the internal struggle, even the exact language. This isn't poking fun and it's not from Chevre. Tucker,

"I can deal with the bi-racial and bi-lingual stuff, but one parent is a Mets fan and the other is a Yankee fan."

A king and queen playing badminton while being held up by their servants in litters.

Leather Daddy Long Legs

"...good night lube, good night lair, good night noises everywhere."

'Are the fish safe to eat?! Heck, yeah! Me and Leon been eatin' 'em for 30 years!'

"And did that make you feel like a little bitch?"

'It's a slightly more advanced version of fetch.'

"The Safety Word is 'Owwwwwwwwwww!'"

'Was that a red light? You should know that it is highly unethical to take liberties just because the instructor is drunk...'

KINKY

'When I ordered you to clean the john with a toothbrush, I didn't mean an electric one!'

'If you're teaching him how to drive, what are you doing back there?'

"Look, I can't talk dude—Megan is leaving me and—what? I can still draft Aaron Judge? What about Ohtani? Check. I'll hold."

"Here on the Cape, Mitchell favors ethnic garb."