Bathroom Boss Gifts

"Rudy, if you're playing a video game in there. I'm breaking this door down. Some of us have got to go."

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

Woman sees towels with 'Mine' on all of them

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

"No more diapers. Simply lift the lid and go here."

Love conquers all, except plaque.

' ... and this is the half bath.'

SWAT Team (going in to catch a fly).

'Yeah. Yeah... Wolf, girl, grandma. I got the picture.'

I've got a new theory, Randy, and it's going to shock the world. Why? Because it's pretty much irrefutable. You know how when you're in the bathroom, it feels like five minutes have passed … but to those waiting to use it, it feels like forever? Yes … And you know how when you're at the event horizon of a black hole, five minutes to you actually is forever to the rest of the universe? ... I think we'd better alert Neil Degrasse Tyson. I call it the Time Toilation Theory.

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

"Do you have any idea who it is you're talking to?"

"Hey Rudy, you've been in there for over an hour. You OK in there?" "I think I'm dying here." "What? D'you need me to call 911?" "I don't think that'll help." "I just need to build more pikemen and cavalry and buy a defense boost before the enemy's march reaches my city." "Get off your phone!!!" "I'm saving a kingdom here! It's important!"

'How damp is this place? Let me put it this way: I use mold and mildew remover as a skin care product.'

'Why can't you be like other men and just sing in the bath?'

"And this is the ultimate in low-flush toilets!"

Other men just sing in the bath

'I warned you to stop snarfing down the free samples!'

'I don't know how I got rid of mildew before Henry got me the flamethrower.'

"Wash and Quo"

"Ten more minutes of media manipulation, then it's off to bed."

"I'm having an en-suite put in."

Asian Travel: 'Absolutely do NOT book anyplace without a western toilet!'

'Mom, you did say it is a bath robe.'

'The snake and plunger didn't work, so I'm going in...'

'All clear!'

'Sooner or later we'll have to cross their picket line.' (Ladies and Gentlemen toilet signs on strike).

Windscreen wiper on mirror to clean mess from youth squeezing spots

'We're having a bit of a problem with the drainage in our bathroom. . .How soon can you get somebody out to us?. . .Have you got anything earlier than Tuesday?'

"Yes, mom, I forgot my towel. Now I need an exit strategy!"

Dung beetles rolling dung and toilet paper.

Week three, things started to get ugly.

'Have you been missing the toilet bowl again?'

Even though all of the positions were filled, Herman was convinced that his calling was to be an usher - somehow, someway.

'Shirley, your hair was in the sink again!'