Basketball Jester Gifts

'...How can I trust you to handle multimillion-dollar accounts if you can't even spin a basketball on your fingertip?'

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Man retrives a mermaid from his swimming trunks after a swim in the sea

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

Dog fetching clown shoes.

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

'I hate playing in an inflatable dome during a power outage.'

Beer Order

Women in a cross country race

Books / Coffee table books

You make me feel more like a veterinarian than a psychiatrist, Al. Why is that, Dr. Kapuchnik? Because you're one sick puppy.

'Look at you. You're a basket case.'

"Gracie, don't worry so much about your big test... You know, when I was your age, I didn't know the meaning of the word 'fear'. Until I looked it up."

Clown riding unicycle exercise machine at health club.

Show Jumping Tantrums

To sleep, perchance to wake up as a different person.

"Yuck! Som'one left their nose in this book!"

Poet's Corner

'Is he taking the piss?'

Rugby oldies

'My dog chases everyone on a bicycle!'

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

Watch the author miss his deadline 4 to 7

I'll catch up to you --- I just need my second wind.

"Would you be upset if we marked it as humor?"

Will sneak through the woods and throw your ball back into the fairway.

"No cause for alarm Luv, that's my basket sales!"

'Sit down, Roger! You're creating drag.'

"Since I know you got your book report off the internet, and you know I got my math lesson off the internet, I guess we're even."

"I paid three grand for this dress- I'll wear it wherever I want!"

"Just a few pumps more...!"

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

Late entry in the Hop, Skip and Jump event!

…You're looking for the Harry who books?… Liz is officially out of the race for "librarian of the year"…

'Ah, Gibbon. Are you learning anything?'