Barnyard Friend Gifts

"Baldo! The neighbor's moving! He wants to know if we want some of his things!"

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Bubble Gum Farms.

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

Dedication to excellence....

A Cow Striptease

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

Lasso

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

'This is my mom and dad.'

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

When Cows Discovered Mowers

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

Sheep

"Don't leave me dangling!"

'Tender and Juicy.'

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

'No. I insist. You first.'

'Jenkins, when was the last time you cleaned out the barn?'

"I stink... therefore, I am."