Barnyard Lover Gifts

"I stink... therefore, I am."

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Cow Show Tunes

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"Ever eat a bird?"

A Cow Striptease

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

"Next time, dear, ask me first before you invite a friend over for dinner."

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

"Wait … where’s Chicken Little? And who is ‘Kim Jong Un’?"

'Bloomin rare breeds.'

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

Christmas Cow.

'Well, Dad, it's 2:00 AM and we've been messing with her all night...'

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

Sheep

'No. I insist. You first.'

'Tender and Juicy.'

'How the heck is anyone supposed to lay with all this chitchat going on?'

"Don't leave me dangling!"

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'I'd like to speak to the slop steward.'

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''

Rooster writes out 'Things to cock-a-doodle-do.'

Oh you baad bad girl!