Barnyard Comedy Lover Gifts

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

"I not only have to wake up the cows, I have to wake up the rooster."

Cow Show Tunes

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Moo! OOM!

'Remember, chew every bite 32 times.'

You can always tell animals trained by 4H kids.

Pig tails connected. Title: 'Where Sausage Links Begin'

"Come off it, you're not working from dawn till dusk: You're working at dawn and at dusk..."

Wife to husband dressed as pantomime cow: 'I know you're exhausted, love, but at least the panto season is now ... BEHIND YOU!!'

Ham-Dram

'Your barn door's open.'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

Christmas Cow.

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

"I didn't mean to trample him. How do you say 'my bad' in human?"

'What's that smell?'

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

'I've been experiencing a lot of deja moo.'

'No. I insist. You first.'

"I stink... therefore, I am."

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

'Orchestra Pit Bull.'

'First of all, I want you to know that my door is always open...'

"We need less cowbell!"

'Is it slop yet?'

"Dad...how do you know when to stop?"

'Abandon Sheep.'

Sheep Ballast

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

'Come on girls, can you at least pretend I rule the roost when the farmer is around...'

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

Cow being clamped for milk.

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"