Barnyard Banterers Gifts

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

Bubble Gum Farms.

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Moo! OOM!

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

'This is my mom and dad.'

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

'What's that smell?'

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

'Jenkins, when was the last time you cleaned out the barn?'

"Don't leave me dangling!"

'Tender and Juicy.'

Sheep

Sheep Ballast

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

Cow being clamped for milk.

"I bet you couldn't eat three."

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

'The kids in the barnyard called me a 'turkey'!'

"I said I think I pulled a hamstring."

"I hate to say I told you so!"

'A Cow with REALLY bad breath'.