Barnyard Banterers Gifts

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

'Ok, here comes farmer Brown, put these on and remember.......act natural!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

Cow talking to dog: 'What...You eat your own...?!'

"Stick with me baby, and you'll eat slop every day."

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"You're living in a fantasy world, Nelly. Farmer Dave doesn't know you're alive. Plus, he's a human being, he's married, he's the church pastor and he's secretly gay."

Moo! OOM!

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Despite Having Given Up His Veterinary Practice George liked To Keep His Hand In...

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

Timmy Works with His Pet Cow

"Haay, Tia Carmen, these eggs sure are fresh! What's your secret?"

'With a herd of three cows it doesn't take long for inventory, does it, Dad?'

'Oi! We're your nipples you idiot!'

'I forgot to tell you Neddy's not 'broken-in' yet...!'

"Don't leave me dangling!"

'Jenkins, when was the last time you cleaned out the barn?'

Sheep

'Tender and Juicy.'

Sheep Ballast

"I just try to do my part- camembert, brie, Velveeta - Those are marketing decisions.''

"I bet you couldn't eat three."

Cow being clamped for milk.

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"

"I don't want to worry you, but this years prize winning pig, usually ends up as next years prize winning sausages."

'The kids in the barnyard called me a 'turkey'!'

"Honest dear, those other 39 hens don't mean a thing to me!"

"I said I think I pulled a hamstring."

"I hate to say I told you so!"

'A Cow with REALLY bad breath'.