Baptism Enthusiast Gifts

A priest is about to christen a baby with a bottle of champagne.

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

No, no, this is Terry's ark, Noah's is three arks down.

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Early Piety

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

"Sometimes Peter I wish it would just stay as water."

Cloning Dept. Ooh! She's got your eyes and nose, mouth...

Adam names the animals (He puts sticky notes on them saying Shaz, Dave, Trish etc).

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

Doctor performing an ultrasound on a Russian nesting doll

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

'Hey, wait a minute...Apples aren't indigenous to this geopraphical region.'

Baby rocks!

'Congratulations! It's a bouncing baby boy!'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'Do I like kids? You bet I do: I deliver babies for a living...'

'Wow! That was quite some push Mrs Smith...'

Ten Commandments

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

'Adam, you left the toilet rock up again!'

"Hurry! Let's go! The world will be better off without his kind."

The First Printed Bible

Noah's ark, many lions

Christian and Born again Christian...

"My child when you look at a flower,you see the face of god!"