Blessing Enthusiast Gifts

'Dear father for what I am about to receive I give thee thanks.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Amen. Please help me up."

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

Angry wife: 'Oh well DONE Keith! Why didn't you tell me the invite said BRING your own spirits?!'

"Redcoat is down! Repeat, redcoat is down!"

'Look, several prisoners in my client's facility have reported finding God in their cells! Yet you claim you've never broken in one time?'

Because of bad weather and lots of people moving slowly on the path, it took forever to get here! Everybody was picking up a pumpkin on Wednesday. There was a huge crowd and long lines at the pumpkin patch. My brother and I can't be seated together today. We'd argue and disagree about who should run the village council. After this huge meal nobody's gonna want to stick around and clean up this mess! If they're still having this celebration centuries from now, I'm sure they'll have worked i

Keen gardener.

'I need to tell Edgar...our house sold for a million two.'

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

"Lately, I've become more spiritual, and less religious."

'Your late husband requests a status up date on how his stocks are doing...'

'I've got the inside track ... But the Devil uses the big freeway.'

Ye Olde Inn, Fine Food & Spirits.

"Can you bless all water on Earth, turning it all into holy water instantly? Or do blessings have a maximum range or a volume limit or something? And would that kill all vampires?"

Give Thanks.

"Why is this certificate all wet?"

'Those showy blooms are very susceptible to pests.'

'Hey, the Preacher is talking about you Dad.'

Church of divine healing - Emergency Room.

"What a coincidence, I'm an influencer too!"

I'm tired of blessings in disguise--if it's al the same to you, I want one I can recognize immediately!

Thank you healthcare heroes

"I need a prescription for phantom pain!"

Hell's Bells Whisky

"'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?"

Share your blessings - give to Toys for Tots, Salvation Army, Food Shelves.

Sea of Galilee - Please Do Not Walk On The Water.

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

'No, we wouldn't want to ask God's blessing on something evil, but carrots aren't evil.'

"I guess I've got the spirit in me!"

Who wants to say grace? Grace! Ames! Would you please show the kids how it's done? Ok. Thank you. That's it? I could have said that! Amen.