Bad Driver Satire Lover Gifts

'I collided with this stationary truck coming the other way!'

"I need to tinkle."

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

"We need to talk about your driving. Some of your passengers have been complaining."

"So, what did the boss think of your suggestion we spend more money on truck safety?"

'Would you watch where you're going already.'

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

Installing one of the new 'Buck Bridges' reduced Bob's auto insurance by 21%.

'Honey, I just ran into the store. Did you need me to pick anything up while I'm here?'

Clown Airbags.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Traffic sign: Right lane ends - Merge into oncoming traffic.

'I've been glamped!'

Left Lane Must Turn Right, Right Lane Must Turn Left, Nice Try!

'Guess what? I'm going to be on 'World's Worst Drivers'!'

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

'Until 1989 I never had an accident...then I bought a car.'

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

'To hell with high gas prices!'

'When you get your permit, you get to sit over here in the driver's seat.'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

Detour 50c.

"Do you sell backup cameras?"

How's my Reaction Time? Call 1-800-OLDTIMER.

Stop at the next chemist please, I've run out of tranquilizers.

Crash test dummy standing by his car.A sign on it says 'My other car is a write off'.

"Flashed again....Anyone would think I was on full beam!"

Bug on the windshield.

"I want to be ready in case there's an emergency."

How To Save Gas.

'We must be getting near the docks, dearest - you're hitting more sailors.'

'If you don't like the way I drive, get off my pavement.'

"I can't wait till somebody forgets to dim his headlights!"