Bad Driver Satire Lover Pillows

'I collided with this stationary truck coming the other way!'

"I need to tinkle."

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

"We need to talk about your driving. Some of your passengers have been complaining."

"So, what did the boss think of your suggestion we spend more money on truck safety?"

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

'Would you watch where you're going already.'

'Honey, I just ran into the store. Did you need me to pick anything up while I'm here?'

Clown Airbags.

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Traffic sign: Right lane ends - Merge into oncoming traffic.

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

Left Lane Must Turn Right, Right Lane Must Turn Left, Nice Try!

'Until 1989 I never had an accident...then I bought a car.'

'I've been glamped!'

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

'When you get your permit, you get to sit over here in the driver's seat.'

'To hell with high gas prices!'

"Watch out Stan, we've got a tail-gater."

"Do you sell backup cameras?"

Detour 50c.

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

How's my Reaction Time? Call 1-800-OLDTIMER.

Stop at the next chemist please, I've run out of tranquilizers.

"Flashed again....Anyone would think I was on full beam!"

Crash test dummy standing by his car.A sign on it says 'My other car is a write off'.

Bug on the windshield.

'We must be getting near the docks, dearest - you're hitting more sailors.'

"I want to be ready in case there's an emergency."

'If you don't like the way I drive, get off my pavement.'

"I can't wait till somebody forgets to dim his headlights!"

How To Save Gas.

"Speeding? You've GOT to be joking!"