Backyard Joker Gifts

"The only decking you'll see in my garden..."

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

Fishing line going in to water and then dropping down from sky at top of panel.

"No, Doris, not implants!"

'Daniel! How many times have I told you not to bury that in the back yard! I'm going to be late for work!'

Golf Hole at bottom of lake.

'For Sale by Neighbor'

Lady to angler whose line is snagged: 'You would manage to get your line caught in the one tree in this entire massive lake.'

'If I don't use the charcoal grill, I get a carbon offset and the fire department gets a day off.'

"Thanks for inviting us over to try out your new hot tub!"

Beer Garden Kit

"Well, I thought I'd give fencing a try, but I sucked at it."

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

'Look...it's almost empty! Those pesky birds need to quit stealin' the food out of this squirrel feeder!'

'Good morning Walters, I see you've mad a speedy recovery from your bout with smallpox!'

Boy: 'DAD, the lawnmower's started SMOKING again!'

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

'Oooh, nice timepiece.'

Autumn Only $5 Per Bag

"I'm a plant worker."

'Must be Pandora's.'

"I hear the food's good. But try to get a table."

Clown watering his flowers.

Gardening for Beginners

'Ken's back was bent at a rakish angle'

Taxi fares.

Dave always likes to amuse himself by accusing the sausages of heresy before he throws them on the fire!

Daisy was adamant she was not going to give any of her milk away today!

Bulltoon: Constabull.

"I have a low-cost project you can which you can involve yourself with."

"And that's why I don't have a steaming pile of s**t in my back yard."

Pull My Finger