Backyard Chicken Keeper Gifts

"Actually, I would rather have a dog. It's just that we need the eggs."

"How can you tell whether it's a rooster or a hen?"

Allotment

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

bird interprets modern art

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

'Superstock'

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

"You look ridiculous Ed. Why can't you just accept you're going bald and ditch the wig?"

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

Pet Store. Bird Seed. "Bird Seed"? I thought they laid eggs.

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

"With Tia Carmen's chickens, we'll get twice as much candy!"

'Slow down,' I said... 'Watch that bump,' I said... Not only did we lose two of the kds, but who knows what kinda damage that's gonna do to the paint!

A man with a bird perched on his finger.

"You'll get right back over here if you know what's good for you!"

"Gesundtheit, Dear."

'Step on it, Larry.'

"What's the occasion?"

'Maybe I shouldn't have brought the termites,'

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

'This is taking too long - we'll have to induce hatching.'

'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'

'Who called me a quack?' (boy has duck on his knee in vet's surgery).

'I'm really tired of hearing about her pious children, the angel food cake.'

"Eggs, eggs, eggs...that Delia Smith's ruining my life."

Early Learning Centre

'Well, you have people pox.'

Chick Billiard Ball