Baby Care Comedy Gifts

Rattle Snake in Love with Baby

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'Doorbell. Must be the sitter.'

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

Six-tier Communal Cradle.

The Elephant in the Womb

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

Jelly I.V.

Congratulations! When are you due?

Romulus and Remus

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'When the baby sitter gets a standing ovation, I don't know whether to be pleasantly surprised or suspicious.'

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

'My first solids. Do breasts get jealous?'

CCTV? Good grief, what do they think I'm going to vandalise in here??

"I've decided to be an organ donor."

Caution: False Contractions Ahead

IV Bags: Main and Afters

'I think you have the wrong idea,sonny!'

'Of course I know what he wants when he cries. He wants you.'

'She just got her first credit card application in the mail.'

"My dad works in surveillance."

"Wouldn't a teething ring be better than a house-brick?"

Baby Teething.

"For the last time, stand up straight and wipe your carrot."

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supearvisor's uniform!'

'Does it hurt when I do this?'

'Home from work at last!!'

"No wonder he won't stop crying. That's the wrong end, you idiot."

Baby Virus.

'Oh, I see. So, you thought you'd come and pass your nasty germs on to me?!'

'Okay, Claudia, you're right, next time I'll buy freshly frozen rats!'

'Would the father like to gnaw through the umbilical cord?'

Baby's head pops off.

'I don't like where this is headed.'