Childcare Humor Gifts

'Doorbell. Must be the sitter.'

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

'No hair or teeth, can't walk or talk -- he's kind of a starter kit.'

'I'm afraid he's at that age when he's into everything!'

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

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'You'll be able to lead a normal life after the operation -- except, of course, for your enormous medical bills.'

"Sometimes I wonder why I spent ten years at medical school and another 20 honing my skills..."

:Come on sweetie, you know the rule: You need to finish your chocolate cake before you can have your carrots...'

Mother and Baby Hippopotamus.

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

Six-tier Communal Cradle.

"I don't leave home without it!"

"Guess who figured how to call 911!"

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: This is solids?

'Quick, I'll give you a piggyback ride home, otherwise, we'll get in trouble for being late...'

"She's a natural!"

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

Therapy for babies.

"That's it young man. . . go to your room!"

Billy strip: help with homework.

"I didn't say he's dying from choking. I said he's killing us with his joking."

'Who says women don't like chase scenes?'

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with a prostate!'

',,,But if I do eat them I'll lose my child support, Oh, Alice,divorce is so hard,'

"I think you may have your gown on back to front."

'Take a letter,'

"I didn't think you'd still be here at thirty."

"The doctor will now glance in passing at you."

"If you get to be a stay-at-home dad, why can't I be a stay-at-home daughter?"

Aliens from the planet of the yellow snow. 'Don't eat the white snow.'

Playing in the park....child on a leash.

'You've kept your shoes and socks on. I washed my feet yesterday.'