Awkward Date Enthusiasts Pillows

Colin began to suspect that his date was interested in someone else

Romance

'Lover's lance isn't the same as it used to be!'

"Darling, wait until you taste the new year's menu I have ordered for us!"

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Next, time, we'll meet at my place.'

In Desperate Straits.

'Eloise! Come back! I was just going to show you some of the equipment we use in veterinary school...'

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

'He's narrating it, I just know it.'

'Would you like to come in for a rejection?'

"Your profile didn't mention you being a chewer."

"My love language - I give words of affirmation when receiving gifts of cheese."

"I guess your reputation for tipping has preceded you!"

Romantic Coffee Dates

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

"Our violinist isn't here tonight, but Tony here will be happy to play something romantic on his cymbals for you."

'When it comes to romance, Sherlock doesn't have a clue!'

Sorry, I don't play footsie on the first date. Neither do I. I guess that leaves rats.

"Oh, for butter curls on ice!"

'A table for two?'

"Tell your date you're a vegetarian before he orders that expensive gourmet dinner."

Spud dating.

"If it's all the same to you, Kevin, I'd like to continue observing the six-foot-rule."

'What happens when your little sister misses her toy money?'

"I told you not to order the Zamboni."

Florist. You're taking your new girlfriend to the aviary for Valentine's Day? Yes -- It's a cheap date.

'You two will have lots in common - you share the same anxiety neurosis.'

"Tonight, you're dessert!"

"I like long walks on the beach and beautiful sunsets, too...but who are you?"

"So this is what we call a 'red flag'..."

Nethead strip: Dates

The Adventures of Morton

"Some people think accountants are just boring number crunchers but statistics show that 43% of 456 people covering 56% of the total demographic were 67% sure that we're really a lot of fun!"