Automotive Guru T-Shirts

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

I didn't even know there was a "Kiss your engine goodbye" light until it came on.

"How about a self-inflating-a-flat-tire car?"

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

Drool Marks

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

'My electric car is giving me static!'

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"Take me to your mechanic."

Deflator mouse

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

Organic Soldering.

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

Inflating Boobs.

"I've narrowed the problem down to somewhere under this big flap I discovered."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

The Small Business Advisor: 'The first bit of advice I'd give you for your garage start-up is to tell your dad'

"Because you're a mechanic, we're going to do your hydrotherapy in a car pool."

"I'd like my daughter to know something about engines."

Kid about scratched up car to dad: 'I made a mistake washing the car with a brillo pad.'

Bob’s Museum

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Car wash / Mouth wash

'My husband thought he could save money by repairing it himself.'

Animals are smarter than we think!

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"Installed it himself ??" saved $50."

'Would you do that noise that your car makes on more time...it's hilarious!'

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

'HA! Your last chance 86 miles back.'

Acme Flyswatters.

"Apparently it's my fault, somehow, that we have an S.U.V."

His and Hers Garage