Car Maintenance Guru T-Shirts

'HA! Your last chance 86 miles back.'

"Is there anything I should know before buying these?"

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

"Take me to your mechanic."

Deflator mouse

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

"If I were a surgeon, Mr. Ferguson, which I ain't, and your car was my patient, which it ain't—except that it is, in a funny sort of way; that is, if you want to look at it like that; you know what I mean—and you was her husband, I'd have to say, 'Sir, your wife is going to need a valve job.,"

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

"We're having a little trouble with our hydraulic lift. I guess my question is, do you still want your muffler replaced?"

Car wash / Mouth wash

Man has applied car wax and sees the whole car melt in the sun.

"Fine, you win. I'll call a handyman."

Gas tank is holding up a customer for money 'Fill 'er up!'

'If you're not over-protective of your new SUV, then why on earth would you bring it way out here on our hunting trip?'

"I told you not to polish the car too much."

"Washing your car will cause it to rain – science or superstition? We investigate on the next 'Cause and Effect.'"

'When last did you have your oil changed?'

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

'We auto mechanics get no respect!'

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'