Aspiring Novelists Gifts

'You're completely unknown with a lackluster job, what makes you think your book, 'Here's How', would produce mega-sales?'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

"I try to write a little bit every day."

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

"What made you start blogging about success?"

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

You got into the college of my choice, and I got into the college of your choice. Now if we could just work something out...

'He's into Proust as only a child can be.'

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'