Aspiring Writers Gifts

'There are so many books on 'How to Get On'...They don't seem to have had much effect...I suppose you've only 'got on' if you've written a book about it.'

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

"I try to write a little bit every day."

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

"What made you start blogging about success?"

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

"I called for you creative people because I feel it's time to begin my autobiography."

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

You got into the college of my choice, and I got into the college of your choice. Now if we could just work something out...

"When I grow up I'm going to be a ghost writer."

'Actually, the entire novel is a metaphor of me getting rich from the movie rights.'

"This X-Ray proves conclusively that you don't have a book in you."

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

"I fell I have a great novel me."

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'

'Your novel has an up-to-the-moment breaking news quality. We intend to publish it in 2012.'

'Look on it as... constructive criticism.'

"Right here's the problem, apparently you have a novel in you"

'On Company Time: A Novel'

'I figured if you liked the first paragraph I'd go ahead and finish the book.'

"Where do you come up with your rationalizations for not writing?"