Anti-socialite Gifts

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

Welcome to a parallel universe. It's like 50 years ago, man. Coffee costs a quarter, tie-dye is groovy, there is a draft. Lots of differences: Free love, man. Corporations are evil. And some similarities. Joy is a new 8-track player. Shut yer #@$% yapper!

"Look what I bought to encourage visitors to go home early."

Assange Among Friends

It is what it is. Settle down! Stop being such a worrywart. What's the worst that could happen? Inactivists.

Unsocial Media

"She also sits up there so she doesn't have to talk to anyone."

"Gah! Too many people!"

'Consumer Society'

"Honestly, Kate—can you picture us in a shopping mall?"

"We've run out of weather-based excuses for this month - we're going to have to find some moral grounds on which to boycott this party.'"

Learning to read body language, lesson one: 'Leave me alone!'

You quit your job writing fake customer reviews online? Back to poverty. I couldn't stomach writing things that I didn't believe. I'd rather sit here and freeload coffee and whistle at babes than do some job that entails compromising my core values. I've spent a lifetime living on the fringes of life because I've refused to play the game. No managing up, no lying, no telling people what they want to hear. No suggesting to a women you might marry her if such a promise could lead to certain pleasu

"The floor is any human contact."

'Yo, man! Actually, I'm a revolutionary! In protest against society I invested in health food stores... Accidentally, I became stinking rich with that...'

Punk

"The Johnsons tend to keep themselves to themselves..."

Closed. Due to there being enough crap in the world!

Social Networking or Death

Stay back 500 feet

"As a protest against the tyranny of technology, I refuse to upgrade my phone."

'I'd like a newspaper with no car, house or mobile phone adverts in it.'

Consumer Society

The last capitalist

"Social networking lets me be social without actually having to be around other people."

'I know living on an abandoned nuclear test site has its advantages - no bugs, no snakes, no univited guests but did it ever occur to you that there's nothing else here either?'

Mans funeral open casket a sign saying "additive free" at the bottom of the coffin

'No thank you. I already have enough stuff.'

'Harrogate - twinned with Tierra Del Fuego (The only other place on earth without a Tescos)'

"You're dropping by since you're in the neighborhood? Hey, that's great. Unfortunately, we're in our car and, whoa, looks like we're heading into a tunnel. Gotta go. Bye."

Anarchist Assn. The hardest thing here is delegating authority.

How nature says 'stay away'. . . Monday Morning Face.

Triple Witching Hour in Apartment 3-K.