Anti-social Networker Gifts

"Social networking lets me be social without actually having to be around other people."

Networking

Bird Tweet.

Mark Zuckerberg

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

E-waste - 'Well there's another hour gone on email.'

Al, pardon me while I check in on Facebook from "Loonytown."

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

"Look what I bought to encourage visitors to go home early."

We met online.

Man-mobile

Facebookie - Odds on boss catching you wasting time

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

'I finally got rid of all my junk mail.' - 'You have no new messages.' - 'On reflection, I miss the false sense of popularity.'

"Hurry - get the family. I think he's about to communicate his final angry retweet."

Faithbook

Mark Zuckerberg

"My smarthome just sent me a text saying it's a mess, so it doesn't feel like having visitors right now."

"At the moment I just follow, but someday I hope to be followed."

'Hello! Don't I know you from the internet?'

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

"I'm not his best friend. But he is on my extended network."

Unsocial Media

"I'm delighted to love, honor, and obey, but I'm keeping my electronic rights."

"She also sits up there so she doesn't have to talk to anyone."

'I wish you were available online.'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absure! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Hi, Malaprop Man! It seems like you're constantly doing something on that computer! I just finished my tracks return. I made sure all my self-deployment inductions are legal in case I get edited by the eternal revenue service. I'm e-smiling right now! I'll bet you're the only one doing that! With my return done, I have time to upbloat more photos to my Facecrook page. I'm totally connected to the social nutworks these da

"Please excuse my husband his media bubble just burst."

"Gah! Too many people!"

'I'm retiring from politics to spend more time on my blog.'

I'm leaving, I've found a new best friend on the internet.

'So I looked at your Facebook page...oh man...there's no way you're getting this job!'