Anti-social Networker Gifts

"Social networking lets me be social without actually having to be around other people."

Networking

'Mr. Smithdon's at his desk, but he's not really there....He's somewhere out there in cyberspace!'

E-waste - 'Well there's another hour gone on email.'

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

We met online.

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

Man-mobile

"Look what I bought to encourage visitors to go home early."

Facebookie - Odds on boss catching you wasting time

"I'm kind of a big deal in antisocial media."

"Sorry, I don't really believe in being social offline."

'I finally got rid of all my junk mail.' - 'You have no new messages.' - 'On reflection, I miss the false sense of popularity.'

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

'Hello! Don't I know you from the internet?'

"My smarthome just sent me a text saying it's a mess, so it doesn't feel like having visitors right now."

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

"I'm not his best friend. But he is on my extended network."

Unsocial Media

I'm leaving, I've found a new best friend on the internet.

"Gah! Too many people!"

"I'm delighted to love, honor, and obey, but I'm keeping my electronic rights."

'I wish you were available online.'

"She also sits up there so she doesn't have to talk to anyone."

'I'm retiring from politics to spend more time on my blog.'

"Please excuse my husband his media bubble just burst."

'So I looked at your Facebook page...oh man...there's no way you're getting this job!'

'Does your bird talk?'