Ancient History Ace Gifts

"Stuff history. We're going this way."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

Tourists

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

"He conquered the known world - now all he's got is sudoku."

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'Let's throw ball. Running game not working.'

Trojan Hurdler.

The Fall of Gnome

You had me at vintage.

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

Sphinx Comes Alive

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'Look! There's a Zyzzkzkk!'

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

"Hey, would you mind taking a quick sculpture of me and my family?"

The Tutankhamen Expedition 1908 (The Economy Version).

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."