Amateur Plumbers Gifts

'Enjoy the sound of running water in your own home...'

Painting by the numbers for adults

Kid with messed up project in Wood Shop, titled: 'Wouldn't Shop'

'Now what?'

"One more rinse and the inside of your car will be clean too, Dad."

"Hurry up, I'm hungry."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

' ... and this is the half bath.'

When Tia Carmen says... "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner" it means "I can fix it with a hammer."

'Every child is an artist but it appears your Candice is a plumber.'

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

"Donald, the dog wants to get back in."

"It all starts with them having you fetch their slippers."

Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.

"I guess it's too late to warn you that I turned off the hot water."

DO IT YOURSELF - Four new jobs we'll all have to do ourselves

Bathroom flooding (man holding tap).

'My hubby is getting better at D.I.Y. . . . Oh yes, he now spends more on screws than plasters.'

"What makes you think I doubt your abilities?"

'Not only did I fix the leak, but when you run the hot water it plays 'Harlem Nocturne'.'

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

"It's times like this I wish I was ore than just an armchair plumber."

"... 'Do it yourself enthusiast'?... No, George is more of a, 'cock it up yourself enthusiast'!"

He spends all weekend under the stupid thing, but I don't think he's really fixing anything.

'You did that on purpose!'

A sudden draft. The moment he first felt comfortable calling himself a plumber.

"Darling! - did you know your books are crooked...?"

'My phone's been tapped!'

"I'm afraid your bath is directly connected to the melting polar ice caps."

'Here's the problem,the pilot light went out.'

'I've been having a lot of out of potty experiences, lately.'

"Jeffrey makes all our furniture himself."

'Just how much time do you intend spending in this new tool shed of yours?'

"I'm charging extra to remove the duct tape you thought would work."

'My client is therefore NOT guilty of malpractice. All he is guilty of is an error in judgment. He should have decided to be a plumber."