Airport Antics Aficionados Gifts

Santa Security Check

"No luggage."

Airport Security.

'Do you have any specific regulations concerning travelling with pets?'

'Oh great. Our luggage has been sent to Alpha Centauri.'

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"O.K., you're good. Next!"

'They're out there, they swallow your stuff, and who're you gonna call?'

The International Airline Basketball Tournament

Couple putting baby through the scanner.

The Headless Horseman claims his luggage.

'You have the right to refuse the body scanner, but then I'll have to pat you down.'

"Well that's just great!! I guess we really are flightless birds now!!"

'We'd like to start by boarding anyone with hot food they've been waiting to eat on the plane.'

The Problem with the TSA

'Those new airport scanners can see through clothes!'

Arrivals, Purgatory, Departures.

Airport security - next step?

"The sniffer dog had found cocaine again."

Baggage Claim: Anyone Who Knows How To Hot-Wire A Car.

'Sure, it's an improvement. But I guess we'll need to get to the airport a lot earlier from now on...'

"Bad news. Our luggage went to the same place my old job did."

I'm sorry, sir, but your luggage was deemed offensive and destroyed.

Uh Oh...

Cramped airport departure lounge.

Given his lack of dental insurance, Tony was initially happy with the officer of a federally subsidized cavity search.

Security: Ticklish and Non-Ticklish.

Lost Baggage Claims

Tall, dark & handsome.