Ageing Adventurer Gifts

'Unfortunately, there's no cure. It's called growing older.'

'This is as close to a round up I'll ever get.'

'Doctor, should I ache like this; I've never been this age before?'

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"One year closer to college!"

Inside One's Memory Bank

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

"Went with the hair plugs I see."

You're never too old for ballet!

Duel in a wheelchair.

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

'Is that all you can do Just sitting there watching your old movies'

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

The Great Pyramid of Geezers

'I have to be honest with you. I've been taking anti-aging nutrients for years. I'm 93 years old.'

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

"I thought you'd take up something like gardening in your retirement, not parkour."

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

"It seems like only yesterday I was on the verge of getting it all together."

Women

"Try to remember, you're not 70 any more."

"Ha! Now no one can call me 'old'! I just overtook a sports car!"

"Colin's relaxation classes seem to have worked."

'We decided to get out and spend the kids inheritance. Unfortunately they insisted on coming with us!'

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

'You shouldn't be nervous about meeting my parents - you're more their age than mine!'

"I'm sorry, but you've had it up to here."