Adventurous Dater Pillows

'No offence, Captain, but two's company, three's a crowd!'

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

Single men in Tahiti

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

I DATED A GUY FROM THE FAIR, BUT . . .

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"I'm sorry about all this. It's my animal magnetism."

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

"It's an app that lets me know when I'm bored."

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

"The cheek of him! At the end of the first date, he wanted me to go to his home to roost!"

The perfect man

'Two Mr. Wrongs don't make a Mr. Right.'

"The worst thing about having aliens abduct you is that they say they’re going to call, but they never do."

"I've appeared in Eastenders."

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

Russian Dating.

"The lunch, grab the lunch!"

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

Mate Mart

'Don't even think about it!'

"She said don't forget the straw."

'C'mon, Larry - you knew the risks when you promised to be my wingman.'

"Wanna do lunch?"

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

'When I said we should see other people, I didn't mean starting tonight.'

"That's the worst pickup line I've ever heard!"

They all have one thing in common...they all have bad breath.

Borrow the Bag?

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

"Is that 'good reptilian' or 'bad reptilian'?"

'I didn't know people still played footsie.'

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!