Zen Tradesperson Gifts

The Meditating Electrician

"Behold the secret to happiness."

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

Dog yoga

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Zenemies.

Yoga.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

Yoga with Baby

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

"I guess now's as good a time as any."

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

Guru.

Remember, it's about the journey, not the destination. But sure, I'll keep an eye out for a rest area.

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Turmoil change.

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Show off."

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

"Hoarder."

"You emptied your mind already? That was quick."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'