Zen Administrator Gifts

Yoga class intrays - in/out/relax.

"Behold the secret to happiness."

Whats ticking away in YOUR filing system?

'You're through around here.. turn in your rubber donut!'

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

'Enlightenment isn't EITHER overrated!'

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Zenemies.

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

Yoga.

'I'm going to have an out-of-body experience -- can I bring you anything?'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

After years of intense inner work, Bill finally got his life completely in balance. That's when he noticed the new loose thread.

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

'Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?'

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

"Hey, no problem. I am one with multiple tasks."

'Oh dear! -- Well, look me up if you ever get reincarnated, okay?'

Guru.

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

"Show off."

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind, and cash-flow."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

"Hoarder."

'Do you mean 'who cares what the meaning of life is,' or that 'who cares' IS the meaning of life?'

"So you want for your three wishes...world peace, happiness for friends and family...and the weekend off."

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'