Zen Soccer Supporter Gifts

Football Meditation

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

Raheem Sterling

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"All of a dither as per usual!"

Mohamed Salah

"All those years of diversity training, seminars and research papers to shred the idea of male superiority....When all we really needed...was for them to train like the Lionesses for 20 minutes."

World Cup Fever

"Chop wood, carry water, walk dog."

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

'Do you ever just feel like getting AWAY from it all?'

Who are the most important people at the World Cup?

2 + 2 = 4. 2 x 2 = 4. Oh, I get it! It's a Zen thing!

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

College game crowd: 'WE WON',,,'and that somehow makes you superior'

Working from OM.

Referee cop.

Ned's Northingness: All the Nothing You Need To Achieve Mindfulness

'Oh come on, I'm sure she'll still be there after Match of the Day's finished...'

Theater or football.

"So, after five glorious weeks, football is coming home!"

"It will be a short service. We’re getting married during half-time."

'I warned him about watching the game at the opposition's pub.'

The game comes first...

'Going 'cold turkey' might be dangerous...I'd wean him off by letting him watch world cup re-runs....'

'At least with math and physics you sometimes find the answer.'

Zen Litter Box

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

'Frankly I'm all meditated out.'

Great. What do I get the man who already HAS nothing? It's a birthday party.

"I take it your team lost again!"