Young Gun Gifts

"You have to give the younger colleagues the opportunity to fly on their own."

"This is the most important election of our lifetime."

'I was just playing rodeo and breaking horses.'

'I've told you it's not the old pencil and paper battleships.'

"Move ten paces, turn, then fire. Ready?" "Dibs on the hat."

"...No it does state here quite clearly...the right to bear arms...not arm bears."

Fred's Canadian caribou hunt goes from bad to worse.

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

'Does this get me a purple heart?'

"The old tricks, young fellow, have served me well."

'When will I be old enough to have my own people?'

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

'Frank, when was the last time you cleaned your gun?'

"Remember, we're the next generation so try not to blow it."

"I told you not to touch it. I should've used your language and told you not to click on it."

Modern Day Kids Playing 'Telephone'

"Does the N.R.A. know about this?"

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

Modern Childhood

"Bang!"

A father comes home from work and is given a baby.

'Quick! Look cute!'

'I take it this is your first big game hunt?!!'

Excess Baggage: The younger the traveler, the greater the amount of luggage required.

'Stick em up' Kid plays with gun

"Gee, Marshal, he must have been one of the good guys"

'Junior wrote his first memo today!'

"I'd like a raise, I can't afford to binge drink on what you pay me."

'It's only a slug Norman.'

"Tomorrow, we'll take on the tobacco industry."

'Hey babe, I got two tickets to the gun show, you interested?'

'Sure, long waits don't bother you. You've served time.'

'Hey, boys, I wouldn't tease the guerrillas - they will shoot.'

Reality of Parenthood